Wednesday, September 5, 2018

OSR Fighter: Gladiator-Butcher

Idea stolen wholesale from Ben L's stupendous Bestiary of Ruined Ghinor.

The lords of Torre'kan shall dine well tonight on marinated brisket
It takes an interesting person to become a gladiator-butcher. Brutal, yet incisively intelligent enough to memorize the anatomies of all sorts of strange monstrosities. Strong, but delicate in their cutting. The guts of a monster can't be punctured - that spoils the meat!

Above all, they must have a large dollop of showmanship. This isn't a manticore hunt (the manticore has already been hunted, caught, and prodded into the arena), this is a gladiator fight. More sapient enemies are given weapons if they so wish, but no armor. Gladiator-butchers wear smocks, chef's hats, and a light yellow jerkin with pantaloons. They don rubberized boots for traction. If they have no armor, why give any to the meat?

To a gladiator-butcher, all opponents (including other gladiator-butchers, sometimes) are meat. Meat is for consumption. Accordingly, gladiator-butchers have no names, only numerical designations stamped on their hats to display that all are equal to the masticating and digestive organs. Whatever creatures are on the menu are addressed as "appetizer", "side dish", "something resembling tender chunks of veal stewed in a light rose-cream-of-mushroom bisque with rosemary", or the almighty "main dish". 

These hardened butchers (men and women alike) rarely leave the city in which they practice their craft. They are customarily slaves and occasionally have to defend themselves from religious or legal authorities in other locales when they are suspected of murder and cannibalism. Most hail from Torre'kan, the largest port city in the Ecumenides. 

Sometimes, they depart on a grand hunt to attend their lord and his retinue of knights, necromancers, griffon riders, giant-riders, rickshaws, or what have you as yet another privileged noble sets their taste buds on a rare, usually magical beast.  

Sometimes, such a hunt ends with a spectacular slaughter in the middle of a trackless expanse of woods, leaving a solitary gladiator-butcher and a handful of retainers with no employer or means of travel. 

What creature probably ate your employer? (1d6)
1. A green dragon by the name of Vladicleres the Shade-stalker
2. A massive mantis shrimp that lurks off the coast of the Anatolian Bay
3. A demon named Rumbleguts who likes to pull off limbs
4. A mind flayer who didn't take kindly to having their door kicked down
5. The orcish warlord Daggerpick Molarcrush
6. A band of redcaps that asked your advice on cooking your lord/lady

What is your "fighting" style? (1d6)
1. A sharp, sharp knife and detailed knowledge of tendons
2. Polearms to the aorta
3. Blinding: with spiked caestus, throwing knives, or even blowgun needles
4. Entangling and dismembering meals with bolas, nets, and axes
5. Inflicting massive quantities of pain through sticks coated with burning pitch, flaying, etc
6. Concussion and trepanation with a mallet and corkscrew

Nicholas Papatzounis


OSR Class: Gladiator-Butcher

You get +2 Smock HP for every Gladiator-Butcher template you possess.

Starting Equipment: smock (leather), boots, hat, butcher knives, and proof of ownership
Starting Skill [d3]: 1 = Actor, 2 = Soldier, 3 = Chef

A: Coup de Grace, Smock HP, +1 Attack
B: Tricky, Carver
C: Notches, +1 Attack
D: Brag, Reputation

Coup de Grace
Once per combat, if you deliver the deathblow to a creature you're fighting, you may narrate it in a suitably bizarre and signature fashion. All onlookers who've never seen this method of dispatch before make a new reaction roll with your choice of a +4 or -4 bonus.

Smock HP
While you are wearing your smock or a similar garment, your maximum HP is increased by 2 x [Gladiator-Butcher templates]. If you wear something that obstructs your smock, this bonus is lost.

Tricky
You do whatever it takes to avoid becoming dinner, especially if it means bruising the nethers. When a hostile creature enters or exits your space, you can use your reaction to attempt a Dirty Trick.

Carver
You're well versed in the art of separating muscle from viscera, and can butcher any creature who you're anatomically familiar with in [HD] hours. This produces crude but edible meat and probably destroys any delicate unedible parts. If you double the time spent butchering a known creature, you have a 4 in 6 chance of retrieving organs of your choice. If you butcher an unknown creature, you have to spend 2 x [HD] hours learning its anatomy.
Each gladiator-butcher has a distinct repertoire of butchery, but all know how to butcher humanoids.

Notches
Keep track of your kills with one specific weapon. When you reach 100 kills with that weapon, you gain a +1 bonus to damage. 350 nets you a +1 to hit. 500 kills gives you +1 to Defense while wielding that singular killing tool. 1000 kills garners you a nickname based on your slaughter style and .

Brag
You may spend a turn boasting of your gruesome kills, presenting trophies as appropriate. Opponents of [HD] < [1/2 HD] of your favorite trophy must Save or flee/surrender/accept a challenge to duel as appropriate.

Reputation
By dint of survival, panache, or dogged persistence, you've garnered quite a reputation. If your owner or their estate still exists, they'll definitely send agents to retrieve you or negotiate the purchase of your freedom.
You'll also attract 1d4 novices a year eager to learn the trade from a master, and will have to field occasional job offers from organizations interested in your services.

Dirty Tricks:
1. Reflect light into your enemies eyes.
2. Hard boot to the tenders.
3. Tackle 'em.
4. Throw something small.
5. Hook a hand in their mouth and yank
6. HUTTAH! *NECK SNAP*
7. Throat punch.
8. Kick a joint.
9. Sucker punch.
10. Thumbs to the eyes.

2 comments:

  1. This is phenomenal.

    I have at least one player who would be totally up for playing a Gladiator-Butcher!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *SCHLORCH* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-*crch*

      Dinner's cooking!

      Delete